I am here to ask you a question:
Who are you?
It’s not a trick question, but most people will give me an automatic answer.
Your name, your job, your relationships, your nationality, your beliefs.
But pause for a moment and consider: are you really any of those things?
Here’s why this question matters: everything you do, everything you feel, and everything you strive for is built on this foundation of the person you believe yourself to be.
But are you the Person?
That Identity - that Concept of Self has become your foundation. But is that foundation solid?
Because if it isn’t, then everything built on top of it - your goals, your relationships, your career, even your sense of purpose can collapse when the change comes knocking on your door. And change comes. As they say, change is the only constant in life.
Most people never pause to quiet down and really question this foundation. It is not an intuitive move for a human to question their Identity. Why would you?
I am John Smith, the architect. I am Jane Dow, the nurse. I have known this all my life.
But have you?
Non-duality coaching begins here - questioning what you have always accepted as truth. It’s an invitation to take an honest look at the assumptions you’ve built your life around and, step by step, uncover the truth of what you really are.
What I invite you to do here is to peel your Concept of Self like an onion - layer by layer.
The First Layer: The Illusion of the Separate Self
Here’s what you believe - what we’ve all been taught to believe: You are a separate individual, a “self,” existing apart from others, apart from the world around you.
This self is the star of your life’s story, the protagonist of your personal movie you call Life - the character responsible for every thought, decision, and achievement.
But what if this self everyone believes themselves to be doesn’t exist?
The “I” you believe yourself to be is just a collection of thoughts. It’s a story created by your mind, made up of memories, hopes, dreams, fears, anxieties, labels, and identities you associate yourself with.
Please note, I am not here to convince you.
I am here to invite you to look within and confirm this for yourself.
Try this:
Close your eyes and ask,
Where is this ‘I’?
Is it in your body? Your body has been transforming and changing all your life. But has it always been you? Has it always been the same you inside the ever-changing body?
Is it your experience? Your experience is yours alone - it can't be shared with other humans. That which you call Your Life is only your unique and unprecedented experience unfolding inside your head for you and you alone, is it not?
That which you call “my past” is nothing but memories. Your memories are thoughts - phantoms of the experience long gone that live inside your mind. But are you the memory?
That which you call “future” is nothing but a mental projection of a possible variation of the future. All your hopes, dreams, expectations are nothing but a personal movie that your mind is showing to you, created uniquely for you, is it not? Are you your hopes, dreams and expectations?
So then, is it in your thoughts? Thoughts are flowing and changing. Every day. Every moment. Last year, 5 years ago, 10 years ago you had different thoughts. Yesterday you had different thoughts. Even before you started reading this article the content of your mind was different. Notice this. Your thoughts are flowing and changing right now. But is it still You? The one who is aware of the thoughts.
When you really look at that “I”, can you find it? Can you really grasp something palpable - that which you can hold and call definitively that it is the true “I”?
See for yourself and you will confirm it - all your thoughts lead to that “I” thought. Everything starts with that “I”:
Your Identity is just a collection of thoughts: “I want…”, “I should…”, “I can’t…”, “I fear…”, “I worry about…”, “I am a person who…”, "I am a person that...".
“I…, I…, I…”
But that "I"-thought is just a thought. "I" is an Idea.
This is the first crack in the illusion. Just simply observe this:
That which you call "I" is just a Concept of Self that is being built from millions of thoughts entangled together.
Seeing this is the first step to deeper understanding.
The Second Layer: The Nature of Thoughts
Once you can see the "I"- rooted thoughts clearly you start investigating these thoughts. And you start asking yourself a question: “What is the nature of my thoughts?”, “Am I my thoughts?”
You start noticing things. You start noticing that you have the ability to observe the Thought.
And you start seeing. Thoughts are like clouds - they float in the sky of your awareness. They rise and fall in your mind-space without invitation, and this process is completely outside of your control. You don’t control the thoughts that pop in your head. You only choose the thought to focus on.
Again, don't listen to me. Confirm this for yourself.
Close your eyes and try to stop thinking for 30 seconds.
You can’t.
In the dark space of your mind, things start to emerge.
There is no Inner Silence.
Thoughts just appear and there is nothing that you can do about it. Nothing is connected. Images, flashes of memories, expectations of tomorrow, agendas, to-do lists, deadlines, intrusive thoughts.
The mind is a wild beast jumping from one object to another. You can't control what appears in your mind. The only question is, “What thoughts do you choose to dwell on?”
The thoughts you are concentrating on are the thoughts that create You - or to be specific, create that sense of "I" - your Identity.
All the problems that you are currently experiencing - stress, doubt, anxiety - don’t exist outside of your mind.
You see, problems don’t exist in nature. Humans invented them.
A problem is a creation of the mind.
It is the way you think about your experience, not the experience itself, that creates the problem.
Without the thought that whispers, “I’m not good enough,” can the Impostor Syndrome exist?
Without the thought that screams, “I am suffering,” will the suffering take place?
Without the thought “I need this to be happy,” can the feeling of lack and inadequacy be born?
No.
All your human experience is unfolding before you inside your head.
You experience your perceptions.
You experience your emotions.
You experience your thoughts.
You experience the Mind.
The Mind is creating your thoughts and you are the Experiencer of thoughts. You see?
You are the Creator of Your Reality.
The Mind is your Ultimate Reality.
Non-duality coaching is a tool for transcending reality. It is a tool for realizing the true nature of the Mind.
Coaching space is a place in which the mind is exposed. In the coaching conversation, the mind gets the opportunity to explore itself in ways that were not accessible before - it gets the opportunity to understand its own functioning and patterns. It becomes aware of its own ways.
Eventually, examining its ways leads you to the place of true understanding.
You are not the Mind.
You are not your thoughts.
You are the awareness in which all thoughts rise and fall.
The Third Layer: The Mind’s Endless Game
The thought is an illusion.
A web of illusions is what the mind is constantly conjuring.
The mind convinces you that happiness is somewhere in the future - just one achievement, one relationship, one self-improvement goal away.
Think about it. How many times have you told yourself, “Once I achieve this [insert your goal], then I’ll be happy”? And how many times has that happiness lasted?
The mind creates problems so it can offer solutions. The mind is the ultimate problem-solver. Why? Because it is the ultimate problem creator.
It is keeping you on a treadmill of endless seeking. Thinking that you need something more to be happy is an illusion of the mind.
What you need is not something more.
It is something less.
Less fearful thoughts.
Less anxious thoughts.
Less desire and attachment.
Less Ego.
Making the One who wants, fears, worries, hopes, and expects smaller, and maybe ultimately dissolving him completely.
Non-duality coaching exposes this game and helps you to develop the ability to see through the mind games.
The peace you’re chasing isn’t in the future. It’s already here.
You keep chasing the peace of mind.
What you need is not peace of mind.
What you need is peace from mind.
You Are Not Who You Think You Are
So, who are you, really?
When you strip away the labels, the thoughts, and the stories, what’s left? When you deconstruct and disassemble your Identity piece by piece, what will be left for you to find?
Remove the name - your name is just a combination of sounds two humans you call your parents decided to call you. How many humans are labelled with the same name as you? What does your name say about your true essence?
Remove the culture / tradition / religion / language - all these things are just external programming you have written inside your mind simply because you just happened to be born in a particular place and time. A big part of that Person you believe yourself to be is nothing but a result of blind luck.
Remove the occupation - our jobs are simply what we do, it is the activity of the body. Are you a human being or are you a human doing? What would be left of you if your job is taken from you?
Remove the past and the future - your memories are just stories you keep telling yourself - these are not your experience, these are just your interpretations of your experience. Your expectations are hallucinations - these are just movies your mind is playing for you convincing you of their reality.
Remove the body - that which you know as your body is just a collection of physical sensations that you are experiencing inside your mind. If you lose a lung or a kidney, will you stop being you? In 20 years you will have a different body, will you stop being you then?
Remove the sensations of the body and you will eliminate the emotion. You can only experience emotions through the framework of the physical body. If there is no physical body, there are no feelings. Are you your feelings and emotions?
Emotion is being created by thought. Your thoughts create your inner experience. But are you your thoughts?
If all Thought is gone, will you disappear?
When you remove everything that has a transient, impermanent nature, everything that flows, rises and falls, appears and goes away, what shall remain?
What remains constant in your being?
What remains unchanged?
Who are you? Really?
Non-dual seeing will lead you to the truth:
You are what remains when everything that you are not dies away.
Awareness.
Pure, formless, boundless awareness. The same awareness that has been present in the here and now your entire life.
Notice this.
Everything you are aware of cannot be you.
In order for observation to take place there must be a Subject / Object relationship. You can’t understand that you are moving in the physical space if the objects around you do not move.
Similarly, you can’t observe the thought and be the thought. You’ve got to be something different.
You have to be different from the object of your observation for the process of observation to happen - you have to be something other than thought for you to notice its movement and flow.
Thoughts, sensations, perceptions, emotions, feelings, experiences - are all like waves on the surface of the ocean. The waves rise and fall, there is constant activity on the surface, but in its depth, the ocean remains still. From that depth, from that stillness, you as the ocean are capable of observing the movement of the waves on the surface.
You are not the waves.
You are that self-aware space in which the play of the ocean unfolds.
You are the Inner Observer.
The Benefits of Non-Duality Coaching
I know the question you have in your mind:
“Okay, this sounds nice, but how does this help me in real life?”
Here’s how.
This is how non-dual seeing will transform your life.
First, you will see through the unreality of the thought-based “I” - the false sense of self - and with it, the unreality of the person you believe yourself to be. You will confirm for yourself that your “I” doesn’t exist. The Ego, that Person you believe yourself to be, is nothing but a fabrication - a product manufactured by the Thinking Mind.
Only this imagined person can have those imagined problems he created in his mind using their imagination. Problems only exist in the mind. They are conjured in the mind by the mind for the mind.
You will see that every form of trauma, fear, or anxiety stems from past experience, but what you call your “past experience” is not the experience itself. The actual lived experience is long gone. What you are dealing with is only your interpretation of it. A story. These interpretations are nothing more than narratives you’ve been telling yourself over and over repeatedly over the years. Or to be precise, it was not “you” who was telling the story but the thinking mind you fully associated yourself with.
You will see through the illusion of the future. The future is nothing more than a construct of the mind, built from hopes, dreams, plans, expectations, and fears.
Ask yourself: Who is doing the hoping, the dreaming, the expecting? Who is so insufferably attached to the outcomes of his actions?
It’s the mind again - the mind is creating its projections, the mental constructs about what could or should happen. It is the mind again that is being attached to what it has constructed.
When you begin to truly examine this process, you see how the mind creates its own interference - the Noise.
This noise is all the overthinking, doubts, and self-sabotaging thoughts that prevent you from realizing your true potential. It’s the stories your mind tells you.
The stories of why you can’t, why you won’t, or why you’ll fail. And the mind sounds so convincing. So you believe it.
The imposter syndrome, the self-doubt, the fear of failure or success - they all come from these interpretations.
The mind constructs reasons for why you can’t succeed, often based on negative past experiences, convincing you that the future will inevitably repeat the past. But past experience is a story. The future is a story. Identity is a story.
All stories are nothing but Illusions of the Mind. They are not real.
Non-duality coaching destroys the Story-Telling Machine - it destroys the Noise. It demolishes the very foundation upon which the Noise is built.
When you see through the illusory nature of those stories the mind keeps telling you, you stop living in the dream of thought.
The past no longer dictates your actions. The future no longer holds you hostage.
You ground yourself in your natural state - pure awareness, constantly present in the moment.
In this natural state, there is no past, there is no future, there is no story, there is no person - there is no burden of identity that is weighing you down. You live fully in the moment. As awareness of everything that is. Right here, right now.
And what happens when you’re grounded in the present moment?
You’re free to take action, uninhibited.
You’re no longer blocked by expectations because you see your expectations for what they are - illusions, self-imposed dreams, self-inflicted limitations that are just as unreal as memories. Without the mind’s interference, you live in what is real. Here and Now. You move freely, from moment to moment, unhindered by mental noise.
This state of presence transforms everything.
You listen deeply, with quiet attention, creating transformative connections. Your ability to read your own mind sharpens your ability to read others. When you’re fully present, you see the dynamics of any interaction clearly. You ask deeper questions, get deeper answers, and as a result, develop a true ability to influence other minds.
The change in you will be seen.
People respond differently to you because you’re no longer reacting from the mind’s noise - you’re operating from the place of inner stillness. You see what others can't because they’re absorbed in their own mental chatter while you watch and observe what is. When they’re stuck in their minds, they’re disconnected from the moment - the only thing that is real. When you are awakened from the dream of thought - everything that is unreal no longer interests you. The power that your mind has over you starts to dissolve.
And what’s the result of all this?
You find peace. You find calm. You develop wisdom. You focus only on what you can control, ignoring what’s outside your influence. You move through the world with ease, allowing experiences to flow through you without resistance. No experience gets stuck inside of you; nothing creates internal emotional turmoil. The world flows through you freely, and you move freely through the world. Every moment is perfect and is accepted as such.
This freedom doesn’t mean you abandon the mind entirely.
Once you disassociate from the thinking mind you start seeing it as a tool rather than your identity.
The Ego will not disappear.
We do need a Concept of Self for practical purposes to operate in this world.
However, the whole game will change.
It is one thing to play the character completely immersed in the illusion that you are the character, and another to play the character but never forget that you are not it. One thing is to be an Actor who lost himself in the act. And another thing is to act, but never merge with the Actor completely. Through non-dual seeing, the Observer does not become One with the Actor. The Observer remains in the natural state - being aware of being aware. In the end, even the Observer doesn’t exist. There is only what is.
It is through this observation, through this awareness, one gains the power to control their mind. You control the mind because you can finally understand it - You are not It. You see through all its games. The mind becomes something you can design, engineer, and program. Intentionally.
Yes, in non-dual coaching, we see the Self as an illusion. However now, instead of living by default, driven by those automatic thoughts and feelings, you can create the Self by design - you can engineer a mind that is not chaotic, but a peaceful mind, a high-functioning mind, a mind that is rooted in deep spiritual understanding - true self-knowledge that You are not the Thinking Mind.
You stop reacting to the mind’s noise and begin designing a life that aligns with your purpose. You become the creator, working with the mind as a tool of reality creation rather than being its prisoner.
This is the power of non-duality: not just seeing through the illusion of the mind, but using the mind to create and live a life grounded in truth - a life of freedom, purpose, and intention.
An Invitation
If you’ve read this far, something in you is curious.
Maybe there is something in you that recognizes the truth of what I’m saying, even if it’s not fully clear to you yet.
Your instincts tell you that this is not just another woo-woo esoteric teaching.
And this isn’t about agreeing with me or adopting a new belief system.
It’s about exploring for yourself the nature of your own mind.
I am not here to impose. I am here to invite you to investigate.
Ask yourself:
What would your life become once you stop chasing, stop identifying with every thought, and learn how to move through life as an effortless being?
That’s what non-duality offers.
That's what I am offering you as a guide on this journey of Self-Unrealization.
If you’re ready to move through the world uninhibited, come find me.
I work only with the serious.
🪷
